Britney Spears’ people need to meet Ochocinco’s people, because The Ochocinco Experience app (on sale for 99 cents until Thanksgiving) is all over the It’s Britney! app ($1.99) like the Bengals' defense on Bears quarterback Jay Cutler.
Spears’ app has two functions up on Ochocinco’s app. The “Be Britney’s Dancer” feature allows users to insert their face into a photo featuring Brit and a backup dancer. Not that I have any desire to be Kevin Federline (Britney’s backup dancer turned ex-husband), but I do look pretty hot as a male dancer. The question is: Would I look even better as Ochocinco’s teammate, running back Cedric Benson?
"Britney’s Sparkler" screen comes complete with costume clad Brit Brit, featuring falling stars cascading down around her and is meant for fans to hold up at Britney concerts. Where’s the dollar function, Ochocinco?
Both apps have direct feeds to the basic celebrity app functions, such as the latest news, Twitter accounts and photos.
Where does It’s Britney! need to take a clue from The Ochocinco Experience, you ask?
Well, the most stimulating feature of It’s Britney! Is when you shake and hear Brit Brit’s signature phrase, but in the Ochocinco app, you get to hear his nine signature phrases (also in Spanish, no less).
And, now that we know where Ochocinco is, we need to know “Where’s Britney,” so we don’t have to check our TMZ app to find out. I also want “Tips from Britney,” because I need her advice on how to plan an elopement in Vegas and where to get the best hair extensions.
Lastly, don’t we all really need to ask ourselves “What Would Britney Do?”
Final decision -- Child, please! Hands down, Ochocinco looks better bald.